.music therapy.

Tonight I'm having  a dance party all by myself! I've been dancing throughout our apartment for at least an hour now and plan to continue this party for the rest of the night! Last Friday, I hit my lowest point in a long time....like really, low. I got some bad news and the wall that was crumbling through out the year came a crashing down without any warning.

This Friday night, though I am bound to make it different! I NEED to make it different! SO instead of thinking about all the crud in my life and bad news I've gotten over the last week, I am deciding to remember the happy times in life. I made a playlist in November 2011 while in Australia to remind me to think of my friends and work on keeping my relationships strong. I am playing this playlist tonight and thinking about when a friend debuted a dance they created to a backstreet boys song in their room, how i elbowed and kicked some Iowans who weren't being nice in the pit of a concert, dancing with my sister at my wedding to a song that I introduced her to, embarrassing students when belting Justin Beiber in their workspace, and soo sooo many more great memories.

Tonight is about being happy, cherishing those in my life who make me smile, and remembering that I am loved.

These are some songs that make me smile and just dance! What songs bring that smile to your face while you think of the memory associated to it?

.let's be honest for a bit, shall we.

So, as you can tell...I haven't really posted any outfit pictures for months. And what the heck right, fashion is one of the main things I love talking about on the blog. So here I am to be honest with y'all for a bit and really but myself out here.  This first year in Minnesota has been one of the harder years filled with struggles. But what kept me going through these struggles was running. When running I was relaxed, focused, healthy, proud, and fit. I felt good about myself inside and out. In October, Dave and I ran our first marathon and it was an amazing feeling. However, after the marathon I was burnt out on running and took a few weeks off. The weeks then added up to months, then it become unbearably cold, and then excuse after excuse..blah, blah, blah.

When not running or exercise, I started to eat less healthy also.  Do you know what happens when an active person becomes sedentary and stops watching what they consume? BINGO! They gain weight! So during the winter months I have gained all the weight I lost over the spring, summer, and fall. While my weight went up I watched my self esteem and confidence go dramatically down. I watched it happen but was like a silent passenger...seeing it happen but not doing or saying anything.

Hence, no pictures taken during these months. I knew my body was changing, clothes not fitting, and I didn't want to see it and make it real. Last week while at work I was ringing up a fashionable, pretty, lady purchasing fashion books. When ringing her up I felt ugly, unworthy, ashamed and wanted to hide. After this one minute interaction, I really started to question why I had the feelings I did. I can't keep watching silently while I slowly destroy my self esteem and self confidence.

So now I have made a pledge to work on gaining back my self-confidence and enthusiasm for life.  I want to work on becoming healthier, simplifying our home, and focusing on what I want out of life! You may not see fashion posts for a while yet still, but I will be posting about my personal journey. I realized that when I wasn't blogging, I was losing the motivation to do things and work on myself. This means, I hope to have regular posts from now on.

I can't wait to get started and really get back to the person I know I can be!

.Jan. & Feb. books.

Whoooooaaaa....hello, let me introduce myself. My name is Sho, I run this blog and I haven't done it for a long time....I apologize. I love reading so let me share with you a list of books I read during Jan. and Feb.....enjoy!

The Road: Cormac McCarthy  Let me just say it...nope, not my cup of tea.  I'm not a survivalist, if it was a fight or flight situation, I my friends would flight. If the world is going to end, I'm going to have a drink and a nap and hope to not have to deal with any aftermath.  This book is about surviving and walking the road to a better place, but really does that place exist?

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The Zookeeper's Wife: Diana Ackerman This is a wonderful true story about Polish zookeepers in Warsaw during WWII. This couple protected over 300 jews in their little, crazy zoo, where people became names of animals. They were brave and noble people, and I hope that I have  little bit of me in them. That I would do the same things they did to protect others.

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Misty of Chincoteauge: Marguerite Henry  Dave and I went to Assateague Island and stayed in Chincoteauge two years ago. Since then I have heard many people talk about this book and have wanted to read it. It's a kids book about wrangling up the wild pony, a pony nobody had ever caught until a determined little boy. He and his sister work hard to purchase the pony, Phantom,  and her colt, Misty, at the fireman's auction. The children were able to tame Phantom but she always yearned for the wild. One day they let her free, knowing that they should not contain her, but Misty remained due to her love for her little owners.

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The Beach House: Jane Green  I must admit, I highly enjoy women's contemporary fiction, aka "chic lit." and Mrs. Green is a great writer in this genre. The book was very easy to read, light, fun, and touches on subjects such as family, and what we want from life. This book reminds you have you never know how one person can change your life or how a home can bring strangers together to form a new family and an unbreakable bond.  This is all I will tell you in hopes you to will read the book!

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Pretty in Plaid: Jen Lancaster  This was a decent book, a quick read. It's not my favorite of Lancaster's but it's not the worst it. This is a book dedicated to all the little memories she has and the specific items of clothing she wore during these times. She guides us through her childhood to adulthood via her wardrobe. It wasn't bad but I'm not going to beg you to read it...just pick it up if your looking for something light and easy.

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CURRENTLY READING:      Confederacy of Dunces

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